It's the final countdown...

I feel like hell.

I have a low grade cold which in and of itself isn’t killing me. It’s the cold – coupled with a lack of sleep and I just feel like I am punch drunk tired. I was literally weaving walking into the office this morning. If someone saw me, they would have thought I was hitting the bottle before 8 am. Not good.

I am coming up on my birthday and I am feeling very conflicted about it. I really love my birthday and love the trappings of it (except having happy birthday sung to me, I hate that – always have) but I do love the day.

I also really love my life right now – I like my job, I have a fantabulous boyfriend, I have great friends and am doing a bunch of things I love and yet I can’t help but look at where I thought I’d be by 36. I try not to focus on that but some days are harder than others. I think I thought that by 36 I’d feel like a grownup and I most certainly DO NOT. Then again, I’m not sure what would make me feel like one – perhaps nothing and that’s why everyone says they don’t feel like a grownup. I know I’m not alone in this one.

So as we mark down the days until the 16th, I shall work on focusing on all that I do have and all that I have achieved as none of it is anything to sneeze at.

And I just made myself sneeze – I’m such a rock star.